Rubenerd Show 395: The corned mindfulness episode (6/29/19)
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51:02 – Join Ruben as he takes a somewhat narcissistic view of work, life in one’s thirties, mindfulness or lack thereof, charities, the events in Hong Kong, the ergonomic considerations behind corn chips, wandering around Artarmon thinking the same things, and a classic clip from Flight of the Conchords. You want to sit down but you sold you chair, so you… you just stand there. Recorded over a few weeks in June 2019.
Recorded in Sydney, Australia. Licence for this track: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0. Attribution: Ruben Schade.
Released June 2019 on Rubenerd and The Overnightscape Underground, an Internet talk radio channel focusing on a freeform monologue style, with diverse and fascinating hosts; this one notwithstanding.
I think we have an internal clock that makes us increasingly paranoid about contributing something of importance in life because it is aware our time is running out. So as we get older this internal time value monitor prioritizes activities like work and family because that is where our most tangible legacies will benefit the most from those expenditures of time. So anything short of meaningful investments of time trigger our internal guilty meters and we feel bad for wasting time staring at walls or screens or videos if there is no benefit to others beyond ourselves. I don’t think we know when we’re going to die, but just the awareness of our mortality is potent enough to deprioritize ourselves and our own entertainment wants in favor of more altruistic endeavors.
The key to not feeling bad about spending time on myself is to realize I am important to myself and my best product, my best output is in service to myself. What I do in service o others will never be good enough or appreciated by them as much as I appreciate the sacrifice of my time it took to do those things. The money does not really truly cover it. I gotta do something for me because that is the best stuff I can do and feel like I’m making a meaningful mark that means something to me. Self satisfaction has to trump everything else if for no other reason than to remain sane and have something left after I’ve given all of myself to everything else. Those spare time projects trying to build websites or writing and stuff are where I recoup my sense I wasted time or lost value in service to others. But yeah movies will always feel to me like a waste of time. I gotta do something, and feeling guilty about it is not helpful or useful.
Comment by Stevenerd — June 29, 2019 @ 10:39 am